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What happened to memes? We used to have lots of them on LJ. Maybe it's time to resurrect some of the old ones. Anyway, in the meantime, here's one that seems to be doing the rounds.

1. Marmite- love or hate?
2. Marmalade- thick cut or thin cut?
Don't mind as long as it's orange and not ginger or lime or something. Slight preference for the less bitter varieties.
3. Porridge- made with milk or water?
Don't touch the stuff.
4. Do you like salt, sugar or honey on your porridge?
5. Loose tea or teabags?
Don't touch the stuff, except when making it for other people (mostly bunn's current addiction to licorice & cinnamon tea, which comes in teabags).
6. Where on your door is your letterbox?
Centre on the horizontal axis, slightly below centre on the vertical
7. What's your favourite curry?
Don't touch the stuff. In fact, don't like being in the same house as the stuff.
8. What age is the place where you live?
About 1980 we think, with a substantial extension somewhat later.
9. Where do the folks running your local corner shop come from?
We don't have a shop in the village. The people running the nearest corner shops are all local I think. (Although the couple who run the post office are from Ireland and Essex.)
10. Instant or fresh coffee?
Don't touch the stuff.
11. How far are you from the sea?
About 15 miles.
12. Have you travelled via Eurostar?
Yes. Really quite pleasant once you're on the train. A shame the journey has to end at Paris Gare du Nord, which is a complete dump.
13. If you were going to travel abroad, where's the nearest country to you?
France (Brittany to be more precise.)
14. If you're female (or possible even some males) do you carry a handbag?
I'm male, and no.
15. Do you have a garden? What do you like growing?
Yes. I like other people to do the growing.
16. Full cream, semi skimmed or skimmed?
None of the above. I prefer gold top (super creamy milk from Channel Islands cows).
17. Which London terminal would you travel into if going to the capital?
18. Is there a local greasy spoon where you live?
Yes, the famous 'Louis Tea Rooms' on Kit Hill.
19. Do you keep Euros in the house?
Not deliberately, but there are probably a few coins here and there. As far as foreign currency goes, there are probably more Swiss francs than anything else, a legacy of when I worked in Switzerland a lot.
20. Does your home town have a Latin, Gaelic or Welsh alternative
Our village doesn't. The nearest town, Callington, has an alternative Cornish name - Kelliwik.
21. Do you have a well known local artist or author?
If we're restricting local to a radius of a few miles, then I can't think of any. However J.M.W. Turner spent quite a bit of time here and one of his more famous early paintings, 'Crossing the Brook' depicts the nearby New Bridge at Gunnislake.
22. Do you have a favourite Corrie character?
No. It's decades since I watched Coronation Street.
23. Are your kitchen sink taps separate or a mixer?
The sort that has separate hot and cold controls, but one outlet. So a mixer, but a different sort from the type where one single lever controls quantity and temperature, like we have in the bathroom. I'd prefer two separate taps, but I don't remember that being an option when we had our kitchen upgraded.
24. Do you have a favourite brand of blended tea?
No. See answer to question 5 above.
25. What's in your attic if you have one?
We have a loft rather than an attic, but you can walk around (sort of). Mostly unused computer components (and boxes for the same), scenery for RPG miniatures, Christmas decorations and unused chairs.
26. If you go out for a cream tea, what jam do you like on your scone?
27. Talking of scones- scon or scown? Jam or cream first?
Scown. Jam first, cream on top. (I'm in Cornwall dagnammit!)
28. Barth or bath?
29. Carstle or castle?
30. What flavour of crisps do you favour?
Roast chicken or smoky bacon.
31. If you go to the chippie, what do you like with your chips?
Battered sausages
32. Take away, take out or carry out?
I don't understand this question. What is the difference?
33. If you have one, what colour is your wheelie bin?
It's brown, we have to pay for it and it's only for garden waste. We aren't allowed convenient wheelie bins for other rubbish.
34. What colour skips does your local skip hire use?
Odd question. I imagine we have several local skip hire businesses and they all use different colour skips. Wouldn't this be the same for everyone? Or are there places with skip monopolies? I'm now imagining that the skip hire business runs something like the Mafia, and that each 'family' has strictly defined territories.
35. Do you celebrate Guy Fawkes?
As someone else pointed out, Guy Fawkes Night is not about celebrating Guy Fawkes, it's about celebrating his arrest and stopping a terrorist attack on the King and Parliament. I can't imagine many British people would "celebrate Guy Fawkes" apart from the likes of Gerry Adams and Martin McGuinness.
36. Dettol or TCP?
If I remember correctly, the disinfectant we have in the cupboard under the kitchen sink is a special pet-safe type, so neither.
37. Do you have a bidet in the bathroom?
Good grief no.
38. Do you prefer courgettes or aubergines?
Don't touch either.
39. In the 'real world', do you have friends of other nationalities? Which nationalities?
If we're restricting the 'real world' to people I physically see on an at least semi-regular basis, then no. The only possible exception would be Mary in Gunnislake Post Office, who is Irish, but she's probably more of a business acquaintance than a friend.
40. Do you have a holy book of any sort in the house?
41. Do you prefer a hankie or tissues?
Handkerchief (Who says "hankie"?)
42. Are you a fan of crumpets? What do you like on them?
Yes. Salty butter.
43. Doorbell, knocker or both?
Electric push button door bell, and an actual metal bell.
44. Do you own a car? What sort?
Yes. Porsche 911 Carrera 2 (see userpic)
45. What sort of pants do you guys prefer? Y fronts or boxers?
I'm not revealing that to the internet! Jeez...
46. Anyone still a fan of suspenders?
Devices to hold up my trousers? I used to be. And I find them very comfortable. But they only really look good with a suit and tie, and it's extremely rare nowadays that I wear a suit and tie.
47. Do you have a favourite quote from the bard?
"Infamy, infamy, they've all got it in for me!" (Which is from Julius Caesar. Or rather it's said by Julius Caesar in 'Carry on Cleo', but that's much the same thing.)
48. Do you like toasted muffins?
This question confused me at first. Because to me, a "muffin" is a small individual cake, often featuring blueberries or chocolate chips. And why would you toast a cake? So I looked it up and it turns out that muffins are also the bready things that you get in an Eggs Benedict. A quick look at a couple of supermarket websites reveals that most of the products called "muffins" are indeed small cakes, so this isn't just me.
49. Do you think a traditional trifle should contain jelly?
Yes. Strawberry jelly and sponge on the bottom, proper (i.e. Bird's) set custard in the middle and fresh cream (or if you want to be really traditional, Dream Topping) on the top. And if you really have to because you can't bear to have a single course without alcohol in it, then cooking sherry.
50. Do you attend regular religious worship? Of what kind?
Don't be stupid.



( 5 comments — Leave a comment )
Aug. 12th, 2015 10:55 am (UTC)
I don't think I could meaningfully participate in this one...

It did get me to look something up though. Colloquially what do you mean by "porridge"? Here, folks eat oatmeal (and though it's not on my diet, I do like it, especially with fruit), or more rarely, cream of wheat or polenta, all of which are types of porridge but we don't call them that. Divided by a common language as usual.

Edited at 2015-08-12 10:56 am (UTC)
Aug. 13th, 2015 08:37 am (UTC)
Not that I eat them, but porridge is porridge oats plus water or milk, served hot, plus flavourings to suit (salt, honey, sugar, whatever).

You can also get Ready Brek, which is a kind of instant porridge. See famous 1970s advert:
Aug. 12th, 2015 12:50 pm (UTC)
I stopped doing these several years ago because I see no reason to provide free marketing information. I mean, it's pretty obvious that the answers are packaged, sold and used by people trying to make websites profitable. There is a saying I recently read: "if something is 'free', it simply means that YOU are the commodity."

Anyway, I don't want to be defined by "stuff". I'd rather expound on my beliefs or Weltanschaung than what kind of clothes I wear or what I like to spread on my muffins.
Aug. 12th, 2015 06:41 pm (UTC)
Now every time I see a skip, I'll think of the Skip Mafia! :-)
Aug. 13th, 2015 08:10 pm (UTC)
proper (i.e. Bird's) set custard

Good man!
( 5 comments — Leave a comment )